The past month has been tough & the past couple weeks tougher. I've spent a lot more time battling pain & have had fewer moments of less pain, fewer moments to use, to share, to have. Yet, in the same breath it's incomplete to talk about the bad, without talking about the good.
Nerve damage is a funny thing. Walking around always in pain, the medication taking it down to a dull throb (never would’ve thought I’d say it's good when the pain only feels like someone has shoved two balled fists up under my rib cage, lol.)When I spend so much time in pain, I don't know what to do. It steals hours & days. When I'm weak & even the simplest day to day tasks become mountains. Yet in-between there are moments, moments to live for, moments to take joy in, moments to share, moments to serve. It may seem strange, but I choose to give & live in those moments, to serve God, to serve my wife & family. I choose to share hope & joy in those moments.
Each moment is like a cool drop of rain on a hot summer day. How many times, how many days, have I forgotten that my life is a gift to share and be shared? Sometimes its hard, when my moments have been cut down from 8, 12 or 16 hour days, or 7 day weeks, to choose where to spend what's left. It seems strange, each day, to make that choice. I sometimes get segments, where I can push the pain away, or hold it back with medication. Sometimes I can spend that time with children (gently now, or you'll break dad - lol) going for coffee, lunch with a friend or helping a friend or working on a computer remotely.
In the midst of it all we have chosen hope & trust in God over fear and panic. That's not to say that all days are perfect, but we are still chaining ourselves to hope. We are chaining ourselves to trusting that God is faithful, He has a plan and He is in control. So, we are still doing everything we can to move forward. Some days it may feel like 2 steps back, but we are pushing and hanging on to that 1 step forward.
So, what is the good, what is it that I hold on to, who or what can actually provide the strength to get through those days? The strength comes from knowing how much God values people. How much He values you & I. Enough to send His Son to die for us, to take our place.
There are probably a million analogies I could use to talk about it: If your child or loved one’s blood was the only thing that could cure the world of a fatal illness and you gave them up to save the world. About a soldier gone to war, to protect this country, to protect freedom, so we could have that chance to live in freedom. So many more could be used, all designed to tug at our heartstrings and make it personal.
Colored words & emotional pulls aside; God’s Word puts it simply for us.
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16
That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. As the Scripture says, "Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame. Romans 10:9-11
Yes, there are struggles, but He said He would never leave us or forsake us. He also promised that He would give us rest & help carry our burdens.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
Whatever pain you carry, if it’s the loneliness of friends and family gone or if it’s the emotional scars and sadness from troubled years gone by or injuries from accidents or war; God is there with peace and strength to get you through. So, as this weekend progresses, with Good Friday & Easter, I will be thanking God for the gift of hope & eternal life that He gave. I will also be looking for ways to not just worship & thank Him with my mouth, but also with my life.
Share hope & a smile today!
