Monday, May 16, 2011
Get a Scolarship for Bible College from Logos Bible Software
Going to a Bible College is expensive. On top of that, finding a scholarship can be really difficult. That's why I was so excited to find the Bible College Scholarship website today. Not only are they giving away a $1,000.00 scholarship and a digital theological library, all I had to do to apply was watch a short video and answer a few questions! It took less than 15 minutes. What is best of all is that if you're in Bible College and apply for the Bible College Scholarship, and put my name as the person who referred you, if you win the scholarship, so do I! We could both get a $1,000.00 scholarship and digital theological library. So, do us both a favor and go apply for the Bible College Scholarship today.
Thursday, May 06, 2010
The Mylogram - Answering?
I spoke to a friend the other day about the mylogram. After listening, he said to me, "Bob, my prayers must be a waste of time, God isn't listening or must not be hearing me..."
...After the local anesthetic, the dye insertion still created pain that shot across the whole left side of my lower back and left butt, causing my back to jerk while the injection was occurring. It hurt unbelievably. Then, apparently my spine is messed up a bit, cause the dye didn't want to get out of my lumbar spine into my thoracic area, requiring repeated attempts to turn me upside down, which caused increased intense, burning pain in my thoracic spine (between the shoulders,) and down my sides. (It may also have also created back problems in the radiologist that was trying to help hold me on the rotating table.)
Mostly, I remember being in intense pain, holding onto the table crying quietly trying to stand the rotation, so they could get results. I heard one of the doctors talking to another doctor, asking if they should stop. I spoke up and said no, don't stop, please get it. So they continued. They finally got some of the dye to work its way into my thoracic area, so they could get some pictures. After the test, I wasn't doing to badly for a couple hours, so they sent me home.
After arriving home, the pain from the exam (guessing the anesthesia was wearing off) really kicked in. Then, that evening the headaches started. We followed the rules & the next day, I stayed off my feet as much as possible, lieing down, drinking lots of fluids. Back on my regular pain meds, we managed the headaches, until they started getting worse Thursday night. I slept horribly that night, maybe off and on, fighting pain and headaches. Friday morning, I couldn't move, normal, but not. My wife made the decision that we go to the ER. I was hurting too much to argue.
We got there & the pain got so bad that I threw-up all the coffee & water I'd drank that morning. (I had been hurting too bad to eat.) I ended up getting a blood patch, where they take blood from your arm and then insert it into the spine. The doctor who did it was awesome. Afterward, I recommended to the nurse that he give anesthetic lessons to the mylogram doctor. Within 10 to 15 minutes of the procedure, my headache was gone & I was back to my "normal" pain levels with everything else.
It actually stayed gone for about two days and I got a milder version of it back on Monday. That persisted until Wednesday. Today, it seems to be gone completely. Other effects of the mylogram are that I have more lower back pain and thoracic pain than normal. Added on top of my other pain, its definitely not comfortable. It was confirmed at my doctors appointment on Tuesday & Heathers doctor's appointment yesterday. And then, I made a laughable attempt to go to the grocery store with Heather for a few minutes yesterday. It was painful. However, Wednesday, overall, was one of my better days pain wise.
So, back to my friend... and God not listening. I had to stop him & let him know, that God had been listening. Yes, throughout the whole thing, I lost almost two weeks of my life that were another blur of increased & ongoing pain. But then, that would assume this life belonged to me & not my redeemer. I responded to my friend that God has a purpose, even though I don't see it, or know what it is. I am a tool to be used by Him. To share His love. Then, throughout the month, we saw additional acts of provision from God. Love notes from His people that we can't ignore or claim they were of us.
So, I told him he was wrong, his prayers and the prayers of many others were working & being heard.
See, it may not be all the answers I want right now, but God has been providing above and beyond. So, please keep praying. God is listening. My pain is nothing but a poor shadow of the pain He embraced on the cross to redeem me. His love burns so bright for us, for me, for you, that he embraced death to save a muddied soul like mine. He got dirty for me, for us. He took unbelievable pain & love for us. From His pain & death came forgiveness, healing & new life. And He is still working, still answering today.
...After the local anesthetic, the dye insertion still created pain that shot across the whole left side of my lower back and left butt, causing my back to jerk while the injection was occurring. It hurt unbelievably. Then, apparently my spine is messed up a bit, cause the dye didn't want to get out of my lumbar spine into my thoracic area, requiring repeated attempts to turn me upside down, which caused increased intense, burning pain in my thoracic spine (between the shoulders,) and down my sides. (It may also have also created back problems in the radiologist that was trying to help hold me on the rotating table.)
Mostly, I remember being in intense pain, holding onto the table crying quietly trying to stand the rotation, so they could get results. I heard one of the doctors talking to another doctor, asking if they should stop. I spoke up and said no, don't stop, please get it. So they continued. They finally got some of the dye to work its way into my thoracic area, so they could get some pictures. After the test, I wasn't doing to badly for a couple hours, so they sent me home.
After arriving home, the pain from the exam (guessing the anesthesia was wearing off) really kicked in. Then, that evening the headaches started. We followed the rules & the next day, I stayed off my feet as much as possible, lieing down, drinking lots of fluids. Back on my regular pain meds, we managed the headaches, until they started getting worse Thursday night. I slept horribly that night, maybe off and on, fighting pain and headaches. Friday morning, I couldn't move, normal, but not. My wife made the decision that we go to the ER. I was hurting too much to argue.
We got there & the pain got so bad that I threw-up all the coffee & water I'd drank that morning. (I had been hurting too bad to eat.) I ended up getting a blood patch, where they take blood from your arm and then insert it into the spine. The doctor who did it was awesome. Afterward, I recommended to the nurse that he give anesthetic lessons to the mylogram doctor. Within 10 to 15 minutes of the procedure, my headache was gone & I was back to my "normal" pain levels with everything else.
It actually stayed gone for about two days and I got a milder version of it back on Monday. That persisted until Wednesday. Today, it seems to be gone completely. Other effects of the mylogram are that I have more lower back pain and thoracic pain than normal. Added on top of my other pain, its definitely not comfortable. It was confirmed at my doctors appointment on Tuesday & Heathers doctor's appointment yesterday. And then, I made a laughable attempt to go to the grocery store with Heather for a few minutes yesterday. It was painful. However, Wednesday, overall, was one of my better days pain wise.
So, back to my friend... and God not listening. I had to stop him & let him know, that God had been listening. Yes, throughout the whole thing, I lost almost two weeks of my life that were another blur of increased & ongoing pain. But then, that would assume this life belonged to me & not my redeemer. I responded to my friend that God has a purpose, even though I don't see it, or know what it is. I am a tool to be used by Him. To share His love. Then, throughout the month, we saw additional acts of provision from God. Love notes from His people that we can't ignore or claim they were of us.
So, I told him he was wrong, his prayers and the prayers of many others were working & being heard.
See, it may not be all the answers I want right now, but God has been providing above and beyond. So, please keep praying. God is listening. My pain is nothing but a poor shadow of the pain He embraced on the cross to redeem me. His love burns so bright for us, for me, for you, that he embraced death to save a muddied soul like mine. He got dirty for me, for us. He took unbelievable pain & love for us. From His pain & death came forgiveness, healing & new life. And He is still working, still answering today.
Sunday, August 02, 2009
Today is the Day of Salvation
Today is the day of salvation. Jesus does not wait long. Urgency comes from the New Testament writers through God's inspiration, about the soon return of Jesus Christ. He died on the cross for our sins. Jesus took the punishment we deserved, and then He broke the punishment for those sins, broke the power of death itself and rose from the dead. He did all of this, so we could have eternal life.
Eternal life, us changed by the sacrifice of God, calling & crying out to us for our personal relationship with Him to be restored.
In 2 Corinthians 6:2, the Apostle Paul, quoted from the Old Testament In the Scriptures God says, "When the time came, I listened to you, and when you needed help, I came to save you." That time has come. This is the day for you to be saved.
Very simply, In the Gospel of John, Jesus had the conversation with Nicodemus, about how to be "born again".
John 3:4-21 Nicodemus asked, "How can a grown man ever be born a second time?"
Jesus answered: I tell you for certain that before you can get into God's kingdom, you must be born not only by water, but by the Spirit. Humans give life to their children. Yet only God's Spirit can change you into a child of God. Don't be surprised when I say that you must be born from above. Only God's Spirit gives new life. The Spirit is like the wind that blows wherever it wants to. You can hear the wind, but you don't know where it comes from or where it is going.
"How can this be?" Nicodemus asked. Jesus replied: How can you be a teacher of Israel and not know these things? I tell you for certain that we know what we are talking about because we have seen it ourselves. But none of you will accept what we say. If you don't believe when I talk to you about things on earth, how can you possibly believe if I talk to you about things in heaven? No one has gone up to heaven except the Son of Man, who came down from there.
And the Son of Man must be lifted up, just as that metal snake was lifted up by Moses in the desert.
Then everyone who has faith in the Son of Man will have eternal life.
God loved the people of this world so much that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who has faith in him will have eternal life and never really die. God did not send his Son into the world to condemn its people. He sent him to save them!
No one who has faith in God's Son will be condemned. But everyone who doesn't have faith in him has already been condemned for not having faith in God's only Son. The light has come into the world, and people who do evil things are judged guilty because they love the dark more than the light. People who do evil hate the light and won't come to the light, because it clearly shows what they have done. But everyone who lives by the truth will come to the light, because they want others to know that God is really the one doing what they do.
I know I put a lot above, but that is the urgency I sense, ...today. In the Gospel of Luke, Jesus was quoted, reading from the book of Isaiah, "The Lord's Spirit has come to me, because he has chosen me to tell the good news to the poor. The Lord has sent me to announce freedom for prisoners, to give sight to the blind, to free everyone who suffers, and to say, 'This is the year the Lord has chosen.' "
Don't delay. Don't wait for the next day or a different tomorrow. Don't let it wear off. Don't pull out all the technical arguments. Wherever you are, you can bow your head, you can ask forgiveness for the wrongs you have done in your life, you can ask for Jesus to forgive & wash away your sins and come into your heart.
If you prayed those things above, from your heart. You will be saved. You become a new person in Jesus Christ.
Rom 10:9-13 If you confess that Jesus is Lord and believe that God raised him from death, you will be saved. For it is by our faith that we are put right with God; it is by our confession that we are saved.
The scripture says, "Whoever believes in him will not be disappointed." This includes everyone, because there is no difference between Jews and Gentiles; God is the same Lord of all and richly blesses all who call to him. As the scripture says, "Everyone who calls out to the Lord for help will be saved."
So, Today is the Day of Salvation. Are you making it yours?
Eternal life, us changed by the sacrifice of God, calling & crying out to us for our personal relationship with Him to be restored.
In 2 Corinthians 6:2, the Apostle Paul, quoted from the Old Testament In the Scriptures God says, "When the time came, I listened to you, and when you needed help, I came to save you." That time has come. This is the day for you to be saved.
Very simply, In the Gospel of John, Jesus had the conversation with Nicodemus, about how to be "born again".
John 3:4-21 Nicodemus asked, "How can a grown man ever be born a second time?"
Jesus answered: I tell you for certain that before you can get into God's kingdom, you must be born not only by water, but by the Spirit. Humans give life to their children. Yet only God's Spirit can change you into a child of God. Don't be surprised when I say that you must be born from above. Only God's Spirit gives new life. The Spirit is like the wind that blows wherever it wants to. You can hear the wind, but you don't know where it comes from or where it is going.
"How can this be?" Nicodemus asked. Jesus replied: How can you be a teacher of Israel and not know these things? I tell you for certain that we know what we are talking about because we have seen it ourselves. But none of you will accept what we say. If you don't believe when I talk to you about things on earth, how can you possibly believe if I talk to you about things in heaven? No one has gone up to heaven except the Son of Man, who came down from there.
And the Son of Man must be lifted up, just as that metal snake was lifted up by Moses in the desert.
Then everyone who has faith in the Son of Man will have eternal life.
God loved the people of this world so much that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who has faith in him will have eternal life and never really die. God did not send his Son into the world to condemn its people. He sent him to save them!
No one who has faith in God's Son will be condemned. But everyone who doesn't have faith in him has already been condemned for not having faith in God's only Son. The light has come into the world, and people who do evil things are judged guilty because they love the dark more than the light. People who do evil hate the light and won't come to the light, because it clearly shows what they have done. But everyone who lives by the truth will come to the light, because they want others to know that God is really the one doing what they do.
I know I put a lot above, but that is the urgency I sense, ...today. In the Gospel of Luke, Jesus was quoted, reading from the book of Isaiah, "The Lord's Spirit has come to me, because he has chosen me to tell the good news to the poor. The Lord has sent me to announce freedom for prisoners, to give sight to the blind, to free everyone who suffers, and to say, 'This is the year the Lord has chosen.' "
Don't delay. Don't wait for the next day or a different tomorrow. Don't let it wear off. Don't pull out all the technical arguments. Wherever you are, you can bow your head, you can ask forgiveness for the wrongs you have done in your life, you can ask for Jesus to forgive & wash away your sins and come into your heart.
If you prayed those things above, from your heart. You will be saved. You become a new person in Jesus Christ.
Rom 10:9-13 If you confess that Jesus is Lord and believe that God raised him from death, you will be saved. For it is by our faith that we are put right with God; it is by our confession that we are saved.
The scripture says, "Whoever believes in him will not be disappointed." This includes everyone, because there is no difference between Jews and Gentiles; God is the same Lord of all and richly blesses all who call to him. As the scripture says, "Everyone who calls out to the Lord for help will be saved."
So, Today is the Day of Salvation. Are you making it yours?
Monday, June 15, 2009
Reason, not the enemy of faith.
Reason is the enemy of faith. It’s a quote I saw tonight, from a person who is very logical. I disagree with it.
It’s interesting, if you will, but people try to reason faith away with logic. It’s interesting, a non-Christian, and even Christians (myself included,) try to fit God into our view of the world, into our little boxed in view of how we “think” things work. Do you know how many Christians I’ve heard that from? “But you can’t do that.” “Well, I guess God’s decided not to work this time.”
Excuse me, for a moment, while I fall back on one of my favorite Christian authors, C.S. Lewis. In the second book in the Chronicles of Narnia series, The Lion, The Witch & the Wardrobe, the White Witch has decided to take Aslan’s life in exchange for Edmund's. Her and her minions danced around the stone table with glee, excited that they were killing the only enemy that had a chance of defeating their rule. Later, the stone table broke, Aslan was back, he broke her magic & brought more armies to the great battle where her wand was broken and she was finally killed, with a look of fear and shock and confusion on her face. I believe this was not unlike Satan’s shock & fear when he found out that death could not hold our Lord. He thought he’d won. It was not within his scope of understanding, that the earthly realm and the things that happen within it, were bound within a stronger law, that the laws of God for all eternity. Like the witch not understanding that she was not seeing the laws that were in place before Narnia was created.
It’s almost as if we compared everything to an egg, and our universe and existence, where we lived was in the yolk. Yet we never saw the shell or the masters hand holding egg, yolk, shell and all in His hand. Until God cracks the egg & takes us out of the yolk, where we live, and we see His face and eternity, do we realize that, yes, there were rules that we had to live by in the yolk, but they were only a shadow to the rules outside the yolk.
That’s what faith is. It’s an eternity rule. It’s a gift from God. It comes from listening to or hearing God’s Word. And according to Hebrews 11, it’s like flour to bread, it’s the substance of things hoped for. It’s also evidence of things not seen. Can any of us see, taste or touch our salvation? No. But we know we have it.
I wonder. If we had been there in Jesus day, when He walked the earth. And we tried to use reason to convince the blind man that could see, or the leper that was clean & whole, or the lame man that could walk, or the centurion whose daughter was healed, or Lazarus who was brought back from the dead, that Jesus wasn’t really the Son of God and that everything was a fluke; I think they would’ve laughed or smiled at us, quietly, maybe sadly & then ran off to continue spreading the news to people who would listen. We would then take our aloof, logical selves and sit down with the Pharisees & Sadducees, and discuss reasonable ways to explain away the miracles & the faith.
Maybe the simplest thing to say is, that faith is trusting God.
I said all of this to say, No, Friday morning didn’t turn out the way we hoped. But if it had, who would’ve gotten the glory? Fannie Mae, a law firm, or God? So, what’s changed between Thursday & Friday? Is God off the throne? No. Has His ability to care for His children changed? No.
So, continue to trust with us & continue to pray with us. God is faithful. We are still trusting Him. Even when we don’t know what the next 30 days will bring.
It’s interesting, if you will, but people try to reason faith away with logic. It’s interesting, a non-Christian, and even Christians (myself included,) try to fit God into our view of the world, into our little boxed in view of how we “think” things work. Do you know how many Christians I’ve heard that from? “But you can’t do that.” “Well, I guess God’s decided not to work this time.”
Excuse me, for a moment, while I fall back on one of my favorite Christian authors, C.S. Lewis. In the second book in the Chronicles of Narnia series, The Lion, The Witch & the Wardrobe, the White Witch has decided to take Aslan’s life in exchange for Edmund's. Her and her minions danced around the stone table with glee, excited that they were killing the only enemy that had a chance of defeating their rule. Later, the stone table broke, Aslan was back, he broke her magic & brought more armies to the great battle where her wand was broken and she was finally killed, with a look of fear and shock and confusion on her face. I believe this was not unlike Satan’s shock & fear when he found out that death could not hold our Lord. He thought he’d won. It was not within his scope of understanding, that the earthly realm and the things that happen within it, were bound within a stronger law, that the laws of God for all eternity. Like the witch not understanding that she was not seeing the laws that were in place before Narnia was created.
It’s almost as if we compared everything to an egg, and our universe and existence, where we lived was in the yolk. Yet we never saw the shell or the masters hand holding egg, yolk, shell and all in His hand. Until God cracks the egg & takes us out of the yolk, where we live, and we see His face and eternity, do we realize that, yes, there were rules that we had to live by in the yolk, but they were only a shadow to the rules outside the yolk.
That’s what faith is. It’s an eternity rule. It’s a gift from God. It comes from listening to or hearing God’s Word. And according to Hebrews 11, it’s like flour to bread, it’s the substance of things hoped for. It’s also evidence of things not seen. Can any of us see, taste or touch our salvation? No. But we know we have it.
I wonder. If we had been there in Jesus day, when He walked the earth. And we tried to use reason to convince the blind man that could see, or the leper that was clean & whole, or the lame man that could walk, or the centurion whose daughter was healed, or Lazarus who was brought back from the dead, that Jesus wasn’t really the Son of God and that everything was a fluke; I think they would’ve laughed or smiled at us, quietly, maybe sadly & then ran off to continue spreading the news to people who would listen. We would then take our aloof, logical selves and sit down with the Pharisees & Sadducees, and discuss reasonable ways to explain away the miracles & the faith.
Maybe the simplest thing to say is, that faith is trusting God.
I said all of this to say, No, Friday morning didn’t turn out the way we hoped. But if it had, who would’ve gotten the glory? Fannie Mae, a law firm, or God? So, what’s changed between Thursday & Friday? Is God off the throne? No. Has His ability to care for His children changed? No.
So, continue to trust with us & continue to pray with us. God is faithful. We are still trusting Him. Even when we don’t know what the next 30 days will bring.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Exercise... (the light kind, hoping 4 the right kind)
It's another weird part of the journey. Being in pain all the time and the side-effects of the medicine to try & make it tolerable.
Well, my last doctors appointment I found out that I have gained a lot of weight. The winter months have not been easy. The cold from the winter months seems to make the nerve damage/problems I'm having worse.
The doctor has had me on nerve blockers, which, they seem to help on a cursory level. But since the doctor has been trying to figure out what is still causing all the trouble, we are still trying to determine what the right medication levels and solutions are. Well, I've never really had an understanding of "medicine-induced weight gain". Until now.
Our doctor had mentioned that one of the medications he had me on caused weight gain. Well, coupled with the increased pain & reactions of my body, due to the weather, I've had a really hard time maintaining the push I had the year before to keep the weight down. I also have the contributing factor, that pushing myself physically has caused really bad episodes.
So, needless to say, we were shocked at my last doctors appointment to find out that I had gained between 40 & 50 pounds. The tough thing is that I thought I was eating in a way that I would actually continue to maintain my weight or even continue to lose a little bit. I was so wrong.
Well, our doctor has changed my nerve blocker & I have found that my appetite has gone back to normal. So, last night was my start of a light regimen of exercise. I have talked to friends who are constantly in pain, and they state that exercise seems to help with tolerating it, quite a bit.
The hard part I have to watch, is that most of the time the physical exertion has put me in pain for days. Even the simplest tasks have been devastating, some to the point to where both my wife & I were wondering if I would end up in the hospital from it.
Well, whatever the doctor finds, I want my body to be easy to fix. So, in spite of all the weirdness and all the pain, I am determined to try and get my body back on the right track to where it was losing weight, pre-weight gain pills.
While growing spiritually, I want to make sure I'm not growing physically. I want to honor God with my body too. Uggh & lol. It's going to be a lot of work ahead. So, I request your prayers & encouragement. Thank you.
Well, my last doctors appointment I found out that I have gained a lot of weight. The winter months have not been easy. The cold from the winter months seems to make the nerve damage/problems I'm having worse.
The doctor has had me on nerve blockers, which, they seem to help on a cursory level. But since the doctor has been trying to figure out what is still causing all the trouble, we are still trying to determine what the right medication levels and solutions are. Well, I've never really had an understanding of "medicine-induced weight gain". Until now.
Our doctor had mentioned that one of the medications he had me on caused weight gain. Well, coupled with the increased pain & reactions of my body, due to the weather, I've had a really hard time maintaining the push I had the year before to keep the weight down. I also have the contributing factor, that pushing myself physically has caused really bad episodes.
So, needless to say, we were shocked at my last doctors appointment to find out that I had gained between 40 & 50 pounds. The tough thing is that I thought I was eating in a way that I would actually continue to maintain my weight or even continue to lose a little bit. I was so wrong.
Well, our doctor has changed my nerve blocker & I have found that my appetite has gone back to normal. So, last night was my start of a light regimen of exercise. I have talked to friends who are constantly in pain, and they state that exercise seems to help with tolerating it, quite a bit.
The hard part I have to watch, is that most of the time the physical exertion has put me in pain for days. Even the simplest tasks have been devastating, some to the point to where both my wife & I were wondering if I would end up in the hospital from it.
Well, whatever the doctor finds, I want my body to be easy to fix. So, in spite of all the weirdness and all the pain, I am determined to try and get my body back on the right track to where it was losing weight, pre-weight gain pills.
While growing spiritually, I want to make sure I'm not growing physically. I want to honor God with my body too. Uggh & lol. It's going to be a lot of work ahead. So, I request your prayers & encouragement. Thank you.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Thank you
There are many times in life when we just need to turn away from the chaos in our own lives and say Thank you.
Thank you to our military & your families. Putting your lives on hold and in the way of danger to protect freedom and serve the people of this country is a great & honorable thing. You make me proud to be an American. God Bless all of you for the gift you have given us. We don't take it lightly!
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13
Thank You, from our family to You & Yours.
Thank you to our military & your families. Putting your lives on hold and in the way of danger to protect freedom and serve the people of this country is a great & honorable thing. You make me proud to be an American. God Bless all of you for the gift you have given us. We don't take it lightly!
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13
Thank You, from our family to You & Yours.
Saturday, April 04, 2009
Chosen Moments
The past month has been tough & the past couple weeks tougher. I've spent a lot more time battling pain & have had fewer moments of less pain, fewer moments to use, to share, to have. Yet, in the same breath it's incomplete to talk about the bad, without talking about the good.
Nerve damage is a funny thing. Walking around always in pain, the medication taking it down to a dull throb (never would’ve thought I’d say it's good when the pain only feels like someone has shoved two balled fists up under my rib cage, lol.)When I spend so much time in pain, I don't know what to do. It steals hours & days. When I'm weak & even the simplest day to day tasks become mountains. Yet in-between there are moments, moments to live for, moments to take joy in, moments to share, moments to serve. It may seem strange, but I choose to give & live in those moments, to serve God, to serve my wife & family. I choose to share hope & joy in those moments.
Each moment is like a cool drop of rain on a hot summer day. How many times, how many days, have I forgotten that my life is a gift to share and be shared? Sometimes its hard, when my moments have been cut down from 8, 12 or 16 hour days, or 7 day weeks, to choose where to spend what's left. It seems strange, each day, to make that choice. I sometimes get segments, where I can push the pain away, or hold it back with medication. Sometimes I can spend that time with children (gently now, or you'll break dad - lol) going for coffee, lunch with a friend or helping a friend or working on a computer remotely.
In the midst of it all we have chosen hope & trust in God over fear and panic. That's not to say that all days are perfect, but we are still chaining ourselves to hope. We are chaining ourselves to trusting that God is faithful, He has a plan and He is in control. So, we are still doing everything we can to move forward. Some days it may feel like 2 steps back, but we are pushing and hanging on to that 1 step forward.
So, what is the good, what is it that I hold on to, who or what can actually provide the strength to get through those days? The strength comes from knowing how much God values people. How much He values you & I. Enough to send His Son to die for us, to take our place.
There are probably a million analogies I could use to talk about it: If your child or loved one’s blood was the only thing that could cure the world of a fatal illness and you gave them up to save the world. About a soldier gone to war, to protect this country, to protect freedom, so we could have that chance to live in freedom. So many more could be used, all designed to tug at our heartstrings and make it personal.
Colored words & emotional pulls aside; God’s Word puts it simply for us.
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16
That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. As the Scripture says, "Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame. Romans 10:9-11
Yes, there are struggles, but He said He would never leave us or forsake us. He also promised that He would give us rest & help carry our burdens.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
Whatever pain you carry, if it’s the loneliness of friends and family gone or if it’s the emotional scars and sadness from troubled years gone by or injuries from accidents or war; God is there with peace and strength to get you through. So, as this weekend progresses, with Good Friday & Easter, I will be thanking God for the gift of hope & eternal life that He gave. I will also be looking for ways to not just worship & thank Him with my mouth, but also with my life.
Share hope & a smile today!
Nerve damage is a funny thing. Walking around always in pain, the medication taking it down to a dull throb (never would’ve thought I’d say it's good when the pain only feels like someone has shoved two balled fists up under my rib cage, lol.)When I spend so much time in pain, I don't know what to do. It steals hours & days. When I'm weak & even the simplest day to day tasks become mountains. Yet in-between there are moments, moments to live for, moments to take joy in, moments to share, moments to serve. It may seem strange, but I choose to give & live in those moments, to serve God, to serve my wife & family. I choose to share hope & joy in those moments.
Each moment is like a cool drop of rain on a hot summer day. How many times, how many days, have I forgotten that my life is a gift to share and be shared? Sometimes its hard, when my moments have been cut down from 8, 12 or 16 hour days, or 7 day weeks, to choose where to spend what's left. It seems strange, each day, to make that choice. I sometimes get segments, where I can push the pain away, or hold it back with medication. Sometimes I can spend that time with children (gently now, or you'll break dad - lol) going for coffee, lunch with a friend or helping a friend or working on a computer remotely.
In the midst of it all we have chosen hope & trust in God over fear and panic. That's not to say that all days are perfect, but we are still chaining ourselves to hope. We are chaining ourselves to trusting that God is faithful, He has a plan and He is in control. So, we are still doing everything we can to move forward. Some days it may feel like 2 steps back, but we are pushing and hanging on to that 1 step forward.
So, what is the good, what is it that I hold on to, who or what can actually provide the strength to get through those days? The strength comes from knowing how much God values people. How much He values you & I. Enough to send His Son to die for us, to take our place.
There are probably a million analogies I could use to talk about it: If your child or loved one’s blood was the only thing that could cure the world of a fatal illness and you gave them up to save the world. About a soldier gone to war, to protect this country, to protect freedom, so we could have that chance to live in freedom. So many more could be used, all designed to tug at our heartstrings and make it personal.
Colored words & emotional pulls aside; God’s Word puts it simply for us.
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16
That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. As the Scripture says, "Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame. Romans 10:9-11
Yes, there are struggles, but He said He would never leave us or forsake us. He also promised that He would give us rest & help carry our burdens.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
Whatever pain you carry, if it’s the loneliness of friends and family gone or if it’s the emotional scars and sadness from troubled years gone by or injuries from accidents or war; God is there with peace and strength to get you through. So, as this weekend progresses, with Good Friday & Easter, I will be thanking God for the gift of hope & eternal life that He gave. I will also be looking for ways to not just worship & thank Him with my mouth, but also with my life.
Share hope & a smile today!
Friday, February 27, 2009
What do I say?
Today is a new day, full of opportunity to encourage, to lift up. Share hope & a smile today! :-)
Why do I say "Share Hope and a Smile today"? First of all, in this day and age, hope is something a lot of people are being deprived of. Tough times have shaken many to their very foundation. Whether financial crisis, natural disasters, or other things, troubled and tough times have shaken people, this nation and many more to their very core.
First, I believe ultimate hope comes from God and is the foundation for the rest. Secondly, I believe that God has given us the capacity to hope, to encourage, to be an inspiration, in even the darkest of times. When we share hope or small bits of encouragement, it can spread and multiply and brighten an hour, a day, a week or a month.
Hope is that light in the darkness that we hold on to in our souls, our spirits when things look dark and we know that its time for them to change. Hope changes us, strengthens us and helps us change our times, even gives us the strength to persevere in that change.
So then, why a smile? Because, when we smile, its an extension of light, of life to another person, its an expression of acceptance, kindness, warmth, trust. It helps light and warm that moment of their life. It gives them something to share, to move forward with, an almost tangible courage to take away and share or use to get through their day.
This has been a tough year for our family. My body has not been cooperating. The nerve damage and constant pain are having side-affects that we never expected. It's something we were told, and thought would just heal. Instead its been getting steadily worse. It has had more than a direct impact on our business, our finances, our home, our complete lives. It means that I don't even know what tomorrow will bring.
As a man, a husband, a father, I've had to come to terms with not being able to meet my families needs. Letting down my wife and children. That's a hard battle, that I've fought more than once and will probably fight again. It means that I've let down friends & family. It means that I've been unable to meet commitments I thought I would be able to handle. It means that I've failed, many times over. However, it doesn't mean God has failed. It also means that, as a family, we've had to learn to trust God even more.
In the midst of that, this week, one of the hardest things I've ever done, is applying for disability. Looking at where our country is, where things are, this is the last thing I ever would've wanted to do. I keep believing that there has to be a way, that there will be a way, in this great country of ours, to move forward. I even told them, in my application, I want to be a person that has been on disability for the shortest amount of time ever.
So, why encourage? Why try to keep it upbeat? Things look pretty desperate, don't they? Maybe, maybe not. I don't think our family has had any more, or any less tragedy than the rest of the world right now. Maybe it's for different reasons than the current "financial crisis", but that doesn't mean other people haven't been impacted even more. Whole towns have been devastated by layoffs. Cities and coastlines have been wiped away by hurricanes. Lives have been wrecked by financial institutions just going belly up. So much devastation, we can counteract it.
People need for us to share light and hope with them. They need courage in dark times. They need for us to encourage them, strengthen them. Whether we can do it tangibly, by helping clean or rebuild in hurricane swept areas, or to cheer them on, to let them know they did ok, they can make it. The next step may be tough, but they can do it.
Friends, family, community does that for you. Our resolve has not been without its weak moments, without its tears. No, to say that would be to tell a lie. But our strength has come from our hope in God. From prayers of friends, neighbors, churches, community. From kind words, bits of laughter, bits of encouragement, to move forward, saying "You can make it." Even tangible help, in the way of food, coats for our children, finding bits of work that we could do, to get us over the next bill, the next month.
So, why share hope and a smile? It's not to be preachy or super spiritual, but just to simply share and pass on hope, smiles, encouragement that has been passed on to help us move forward. To let people know that God's Word isn't just another metaphysical journey out there, but that there are many that aren't afraid to live it in a real way and share a tangible hope in it.
So, if there is something we can give forward, small though it may be, we want to do that. To share hope & a smile, and give in a tangible way. It only takes a little bit of light to brighten a dark room. No matter what our faith, we can turn that light on. We can share a resolute hope, an encouraging smile. That hope can be a rudder that changes the direction of industry, of stock markets, of bank opinions.
Blessed is the man that trusts in the Lord, and whose hope is in the Lord, For he will be as a tree planted by the waters, that spreads out her roots by the river, and will not see when heat comes, but her leaf will be green; and will not need to be careful in the year of drought or stop yielding fruit. Jeremiah 17:7-8
Why do I say "Share Hope and a Smile today"? First of all, in this day and age, hope is something a lot of people are being deprived of. Tough times have shaken many to their very foundation. Whether financial crisis, natural disasters, or other things, troubled and tough times have shaken people, this nation and many more to their very core.
First, I believe ultimate hope comes from God and is the foundation for the rest. Secondly, I believe that God has given us the capacity to hope, to encourage, to be an inspiration, in even the darkest of times. When we share hope or small bits of encouragement, it can spread and multiply and brighten an hour, a day, a week or a month.
Hope is that light in the darkness that we hold on to in our souls, our spirits when things look dark and we know that its time for them to change. Hope changes us, strengthens us and helps us change our times, even gives us the strength to persevere in that change.
So then, why a smile? Because, when we smile, its an extension of light, of life to another person, its an expression of acceptance, kindness, warmth, trust. It helps light and warm that moment of their life. It gives them something to share, to move forward with, an almost tangible courage to take away and share or use to get through their day.
This has been a tough year for our family. My body has not been cooperating. The nerve damage and constant pain are having side-affects that we never expected. It's something we were told, and thought would just heal. Instead its been getting steadily worse. It has had more than a direct impact on our business, our finances, our home, our complete lives. It means that I don't even know what tomorrow will bring.
As a man, a husband, a father, I've had to come to terms with not being able to meet my families needs. Letting down my wife and children. That's a hard battle, that I've fought more than once and will probably fight again. It means that I've let down friends & family. It means that I've been unable to meet commitments I thought I would be able to handle. It means that I've failed, many times over. However, it doesn't mean God has failed. It also means that, as a family, we've had to learn to trust God even more.
In the midst of that, this week, one of the hardest things I've ever done, is applying for disability. Looking at where our country is, where things are, this is the last thing I ever would've wanted to do. I keep believing that there has to be a way, that there will be a way, in this great country of ours, to move forward. I even told them, in my application, I want to be a person that has been on disability for the shortest amount of time ever.
So, why encourage? Why try to keep it upbeat? Things look pretty desperate, don't they? Maybe, maybe not. I don't think our family has had any more, or any less tragedy than the rest of the world right now. Maybe it's for different reasons than the current "financial crisis", but that doesn't mean other people haven't been impacted even more. Whole towns have been devastated by layoffs. Cities and coastlines have been wiped away by hurricanes. Lives have been wrecked by financial institutions just going belly up. So much devastation, we can counteract it.
People need for us to share light and hope with them. They need courage in dark times. They need for us to encourage them, strengthen them. Whether we can do it tangibly, by helping clean or rebuild in hurricane swept areas, or to cheer them on, to let them know they did ok, they can make it. The next step may be tough, but they can do it.
Friends, family, community does that for you. Our resolve has not been without its weak moments, without its tears. No, to say that would be to tell a lie. But our strength has come from our hope in God. From prayers of friends, neighbors, churches, community. From kind words, bits of laughter, bits of encouragement, to move forward, saying "You can make it." Even tangible help, in the way of food, coats for our children, finding bits of work that we could do, to get us over the next bill, the next month.
So, why share hope and a smile? It's not to be preachy or super spiritual, but just to simply share and pass on hope, smiles, encouragement that has been passed on to help us move forward. To let people know that God's Word isn't just another metaphysical journey out there, but that there are many that aren't afraid to live it in a real way and share a tangible hope in it.
So, if there is something we can give forward, small though it may be, we want to do that. To share hope & a smile, and give in a tangible way. It only takes a little bit of light to brighten a dark room. No matter what our faith, we can turn that light on. We can share a resolute hope, an encouraging smile. That hope can be a rudder that changes the direction of industry, of stock markets, of bank opinions.
Blessed is the man that trusts in the Lord, and whose hope is in the Lord, For he will be as a tree planted by the waters, that spreads out her roots by the river, and will not see when heat comes, but her leaf will be green; and will not need to be careful in the year of drought or stop yielding fruit. Jeremiah 17:7-8
Friday, January 16, 2009
My brother - Joseph
I didn't want this to be my first post of the New Year. My next post will be a late January New Year's post. For me, this is probably some closure or something.
My brother was a happy, curly-haired redhead as a child. He so loved to tease his older sisters. He was always joking, smiling and having fun. In his 20's he was in retail management at Wal-Mart, even being considered for assistant store manager positions.
He was funny, in his own way about money too. You'd swear he could spend a penny twice and then still end up with it back in his bank account. He was careful with money and we figured that he would probably be the most successful with business and finances.
He loved his nieces & nephews, would play with them and joke and goof around. After traveling around and seeing the country, he moved to the Atlanta, Georgia area. He was working as a store manager for one of the big drugstore chains and UPS at the same time. Not sure on the reasons, surviving on caffeine stay-awake pills, the strain of being away from family or what, but he had a nervous breakdown, of sorts.
After the police there picking him up and us not knowing, trying to find him and not being able to for some time, a compassionate social worker in the Atlanta jail system and psychiatric evaluations, it was figured out that he was paranoid schizophrenic. This meant a weird journey into dealing with mental illness in our family. My mom bore the brunt of it. My brother Tim, living at home bore a large part of it. But we all participated, helping when we could, coming to grips with the reality of it.
Having someone with mental illness in your family bears this stigma. At first, you feel it, but you realize he really does. As much as it scares people, its almost a worse ostracism than leprosy, almost as if people thought it was contagious. He struggled to not be this groggy person, he wanted normalcy, just like any sick person. For whatever reason though, it would have been more socially acceptable for him to be physically ill. He was sick. When he was on his medication, he was closer to the old Joe. When he was off it, he was afraid, angry, delusional. He was even afraid of the people who loved him the most and wanted to help him. He made decisions that we could never understand the logic behind, because there wasn't any. His mind was broken. His heart wasn't.
There were a lot of journey's during all of it. The hardest part was watching the side-effects of the medications, when he would first take them. He would be this groggy, clouded person. You could almost feel the effects with him, because asking a question, him answering would be a long deliberate process, sometimes telling he couldn't remember the question by the time the answer was done.
The cool parts were that between the ups & downs our old Joseph would show up. The one that cared about people, that wanted to be normal, that would help you at the drop of a hat. My mom really worked with the social worker and Joe to help him get his dignity back. They worked hard over the years to give him all his "me stuff" back. The things we take for granted at turning 18, whether we can handle it or not, the government says your an adult. The illness took all that away from him. The only thing he couldn't get back was medical guardianship. If my mom had given that up, it would have ended up in the hands of the courts.
He really loved the kids. I think he saw them as accepting and loving him unconditionally. He was always in the middle of them. Gently playing with them. Helping with hay rides and walks and finding new things on the farm.
He loved his family and loved God. He always wanted to help, but didn't always know how.
I watched him build an online group of friends (a guild) in World of Warcraft (an online video game) and lead them in raids and to parts of the game I'll probably never reach. I think the anonymity and lack of people knowing about his illness, helped him feel like he could do something, without being judged for it, it gave him a place of normalcy. He would be so proud show me areas of the game that he had conquered and been too. The hardest part was after they upped his medication the last time, he couldn't focus even on the details of that anymore.
Joe, I think you struggled with accepting yourself the way you were. Mental disability can be as hard to accept as physical. I don't know the pain that you lived with inside because of it. I can relate to physical pain and tell you how hard it is to accept that my body doesn't do what I want it to. We accepted you, loved you. We didn't care about all the popular stuff, whether you were climbing the ladder of success or dashing or rich. We loved you. Yes, we struggled with the realities of your illness. But we loved you. We accepted you. It didn't matter how hard it was. We accepted you.
Joe had been doing really well the past year. Responding more to his doctor and social worker, getting more involved at his church, volunteering, working on his GED, so he could go to college. He showed a lot of promise and there was hope that he was going to be able to get his own apartment, that kind of thing. He had been pouring a lot of love into his family, seemed somewhat "normal" (whatever that means) at Christmas and over the holidays.
And then he just left mom a short note. About how he couldn't handle life the way it was anymore. Where to find him. That he hoped God and her would forgive him.
And my little brother was gone.
There are so many questions. Unanswered. But we know you are now at peace, with your maker.
We are all crying. Nieces, nephews, close family, distant family, friends, friends of family.
Share Hope & a Smile! You really never know how many lives it can touch.
Suicide is never the right answer. There is hope, there is love, there are people who care.
If you are thinking of taking your own life, Please don't.
You are loved!
Call and talk to someone who cares.
1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)
My brother was a happy, curly-haired redhead as a child. He so loved to tease his older sisters. He was always joking, smiling and having fun. In his 20's he was in retail management at Wal-Mart, even being considered for assistant store manager positions.
He was funny, in his own way about money too. You'd swear he could spend a penny twice and then still end up with it back in his bank account. He was careful with money and we figured that he would probably be the most successful with business and finances.
He loved his nieces & nephews, would play with them and joke and goof around. After traveling around and seeing the country, he moved to the Atlanta, Georgia area. He was working as a store manager for one of the big drugstore chains and UPS at the same time. Not sure on the reasons, surviving on caffeine stay-awake pills, the strain of being away from family or what, but he had a nervous breakdown, of sorts.
After the police there picking him up and us not knowing, trying to find him and not being able to for some time, a compassionate social worker in the Atlanta jail system and psychiatric evaluations, it was figured out that he was paranoid schizophrenic. This meant a weird journey into dealing with mental illness in our family. My mom bore the brunt of it. My brother Tim, living at home bore a large part of it. But we all participated, helping when we could, coming to grips with the reality of it.
Having someone with mental illness in your family bears this stigma. At first, you feel it, but you realize he really does. As much as it scares people, its almost a worse ostracism than leprosy, almost as if people thought it was contagious. He struggled to not be this groggy person, he wanted normalcy, just like any sick person. For whatever reason though, it would have been more socially acceptable for him to be physically ill. He was sick. When he was on his medication, he was closer to the old Joe. When he was off it, he was afraid, angry, delusional. He was even afraid of the people who loved him the most and wanted to help him. He made decisions that we could never understand the logic behind, because there wasn't any. His mind was broken. His heart wasn't.
There were a lot of journey's during all of it. The hardest part was watching the side-effects of the medications, when he would first take them. He would be this groggy, clouded person. You could almost feel the effects with him, because asking a question, him answering would be a long deliberate process, sometimes telling he couldn't remember the question by the time the answer was done.
The cool parts were that between the ups & downs our old Joseph would show up. The one that cared about people, that wanted to be normal, that would help you at the drop of a hat. My mom really worked with the social worker and Joe to help him get his dignity back. They worked hard over the years to give him all his "me stuff" back. The things we take for granted at turning 18, whether we can handle it or not, the government says your an adult. The illness took all that away from him. The only thing he couldn't get back was medical guardianship. If my mom had given that up, it would have ended up in the hands of the courts.
He really loved the kids. I think he saw them as accepting and loving him unconditionally. He was always in the middle of them. Gently playing with them. Helping with hay rides and walks and finding new things on the farm.
He loved his family and loved God. He always wanted to help, but didn't always know how.
I watched him build an online group of friends (a guild) in World of Warcraft (an online video game) and lead them in raids and to parts of the game I'll probably never reach. I think the anonymity and lack of people knowing about his illness, helped him feel like he could do something, without being judged for it, it gave him a place of normalcy. He would be so proud show me areas of the game that he had conquered and been too. The hardest part was after they upped his medication the last time, he couldn't focus even on the details of that anymore.
Joe, I think you struggled with accepting yourself the way you were. Mental disability can be as hard to accept as physical. I don't know the pain that you lived with inside because of it. I can relate to physical pain and tell you how hard it is to accept that my body doesn't do what I want it to. We accepted you, loved you. We didn't care about all the popular stuff, whether you were climbing the ladder of success or dashing or rich. We loved you. Yes, we struggled with the realities of your illness. But we loved you. We accepted you. It didn't matter how hard it was. We accepted you.
Joe had been doing really well the past year. Responding more to his doctor and social worker, getting more involved at his church, volunteering, working on his GED, so he could go to college. He showed a lot of promise and there was hope that he was going to be able to get his own apartment, that kind of thing. He had been pouring a lot of love into his family, seemed somewhat "normal" (whatever that means) at Christmas and over the holidays.
And then he just left mom a short note. About how he couldn't handle life the way it was anymore. Where to find him. That he hoped God and her would forgive him.
And my little brother was gone.
There are so many questions. Unanswered. But we know you are now at peace, with your maker.
We are all crying. Nieces, nephews, close family, distant family, friends, friends of family.
Share Hope & a Smile! You really never know how many lives it can touch.
Suicide is never the right answer. There is hope, there is love, there are people who care.
If you are thinking of taking your own life, Please don't.
You are loved!
Call and talk to someone who cares.
1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)
Sunday, December 21, 2008
A Different Christmas Poem - Passing on a Tribute to our Men & Women in the Military
This was sent to me by a friend who is a former Marine. (Is there such a thing as former Marine?) I have a lot of respect for and gratitude to the men & women who serve our country and many others protecting our right to be free. The message was asked to be forwarded, so I'm posting it here, in hopes that many will see it.
Thank you to our military, the men & women on the front lines of freedom. Thank you for being there at Christmas and other holidays! Thank you for all that you do for us!
Love Bob, Heather and Kids
... Begin forwarded message :-)
Thank you to our military, the men & women on the front lines of freedom. Thank you for being there at Christmas and other holidays! Thank you for all that you do for us!
Love Bob, Heather and Kids
... Begin forwarded message :-)
A Different Christmas Poem
The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.
Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.
The sparkling lights in the tree I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.
My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep.
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,
So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.
The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know, Then the
sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.
My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near.
Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.
A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old,
Perhaps a Marine, huddled here in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, and my wife and my child.
'What are you doing?' I asked without fear,
'Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!'
For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts.
To the window that danced with a warm fire's light
Then he sighed and he said 'Its really all right,
I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night.'
'It's my duty to stand at the front of the line,
That separates you from the darkest of times.
No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.
My Gramps died at '
Then he sighed, 'That's a Christmas 'Gram always remembers.'
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of '
And now it is my turn and so, here I am.
I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But my wife sends me pictures, he's sure got her smile.
Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red, white, and blue... an American flag.
I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home.
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.
I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life with my sister and brother...
Who stand at the front against any and all,
To ensure for all time that this flag will not fall.'
' So go back inside,' he said, 'harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right.'
'But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
'Give you money,' I asked, 'or prepare you a feast?
It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife and your son.'
Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
'Just tell us you love us, and never forget.
To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled.
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us.'
PLEASE, would you do me the kind favor of sending this to as many
people as you can? Christmas will be coming soon and some credit is due to our
U.S service men and women for our being able to celebrate these
festivities. Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe. Make people
stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us.
LCDR Jeff Giles, SC, USN
30th Naval Construction Regiment
OIC, Logistics Cell One
Al Taqqadum,
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Humbled by the Giver, (or, It's Good to be a Sap This Time of Year)
We just got this envelope in the mail the other day. The people that we got it from could have had a justified begging & whine session, about how hard things have been lately on charities, about how badly they need us to give. But no, they decided to give a small gift and this bit of encouragement to pass on in a small, non-obtrusive card. So, I wanted to share it, and some other small bits of what encourage me. This time of year it is especially important for us to look beyond ourselves and share.
Hope"Of all the forces that make for a better world, none is so powerful as hope.
With hope, one can think, one can work, one can dream. If you have hope, you have everything."
Faith
"Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."
Love
"No greater love have a man than this, than that he lay down his life for another."
There are many reasons throughout a holiday season, that we can get caught in the rush and forget the person in front of us may also have just come from a bad day at work, or from a family member in the hospital, or from a layoff, or tough time at the doctor or lost a family member to a war or illness. It's so easy for us to forget that what is in front of us, isn't a what, but a who. That person is a brother or uncle or mom or sister.
Maybe for them, the holidays are that tough time of year, where a simple kindness can take them through to the next day, or the next month or the next year.
That's why I'm always blathering on about sharing a hope and a smile. Sometimes we have to step outside of ourselves and the problems we are living with and think about sharing a warm chocolate chip cookie and a glass of milk, or hot cup of cocoa or coffee with the person in front of or behind us.
Let's purpose to make Christmas more than a sales booster or rush for the next best thing, instead...
Maybe for them, the holidays are that tough time of year, where a simple kindness can take them through to the next day, or the next month or the next year.
That's why I'm always blathering on about sharing a hope and a smile. Sometimes we have to step outside of ourselves and the problems we are living with and think about sharing a warm chocolate chip cookie and a glass of milk, or hot cup of cocoa or coffee with the person in front of or behind us.
Let's purpose to make Christmas more than a sales booster or rush for the next best thing, instead...
lets share hope and a smile.
Friday, December 05, 2008
Hope - The Real Thing
Every tomorrow and every today have the chance to be a better day.
There is hope for tomorrow.
There is hope for our financial futures, there is hope for our physical future and most importantly, there is hope for our spiritual futures.
It's not too much to be who we are. It's also not too much to be who we should be, when we go forward in God's strength.
So, why talk about God's strength, not just about people strength? Because we wear out, we get tired. The weather turns gray and wintery and we get blue. The next thing happens and we change again. We as people can be swayed by every inner turmoil to inner peace and back again.
God doesn't change. The Creator of the foundations of time itself and the foundations of this world cares about each of us individually and personally. (Psalm 73:26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever!)
He stepped out of His place, into ours. He carried a cross, to take our punishment and He rose again, to give us eternity. And while He walked among us, He promised us His care, as a Father. He told us there would be storms, and He promised us His peace during them. He promised us protection. He never said there wouldn't be battles, but He did say He would fight them for us.
If you think about that, it's awe-inspiring. If we think about the gifts that God has given us, about what He has done for us, it's amazing. He even takes it further. God tells us that we can come to Him directly, because of what His Son did.
So, what is the practical application? It's looking every day for a way to encourage, a way to share hope. Sometimes it's smiling and encouraging, even when we don't feel like it.
Hope doesn't always come in a basket or a trinket. Sometimes we find it in a quiet voice saying it will be ok, take the next step. Other times we find it in the beauty of a single icicle or the intricacy of a single leaf on a tree. Sometimes we find it in the peace of the woods or the power of a mountain landscape or rushing river.
Sometimes hope is found in the eyes of those we love, and sometimes we are meant to share the hope we have inside us to make that person's eyes come to life again. We have a choice every day, to share hope or tear it down. I want to share the hope I have inside of me with you. I want to share with you the beauty of life, of creation of God's grace and strength in the midst of all of the bad stuff.
When the "real" world creeps in on Wall Street and banks and the fear of losing everything. When job losses abound and everything is so heavy we don't know what to do, where do we turn? When the lights go down, when health won't cooperate, who do we lean on?
Personally, I look for a reason to give. I look to God to hold me up when I'm not strong. I thank Him for His blessings.
I remember the words of Jesus in Matthew 11:29, 30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
I also remember His words in Luke 12:22-26 ..."Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?"
Sometimes we spend so much time worrying, we forget to share the hope that is in us. We forget to give that smile. That strong, encouraging word that they can make it! We may think it's sappy, but its not. In times of struggle, lets stand together and spread hope & smiles like the person next to us may not see another for a lifetime.
Lets not forget to share the beauty of this life God gave us and give people hope for a future of good in the midst of all their circumstances.
Be bold! Share hope & a smile today! :-)
There is hope for tomorrow.
There is hope for our financial futures, there is hope for our physical future and most importantly, there is hope for our spiritual futures.
It's not too much to be who we are. It's also not too much to be who we should be, when we go forward in God's strength.
So, why talk about God's strength, not just about people strength? Because we wear out, we get tired. The weather turns gray and wintery and we get blue. The next thing happens and we change again. We as people can be swayed by every inner turmoil to inner peace and back again.
God doesn't change. The Creator of the foundations of time itself and the foundations of this world cares about each of us individually and personally. (Psalm 73:26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever!)
He stepped out of His place, into ours. He carried a cross, to take our punishment and He rose again, to give us eternity. And while He walked among us, He promised us His care, as a Father. He told us there would be storms, and He promised us His peace during them. He promised us protection. He never said there wouldn't be battles, but He did say He would fight them for us.
If you think about that, it's awe-inspiring. If we think about the gifts that God has given us, about what He has done for us, it's amazing. He even takes it further. God tells us that we can come to Him directly, because of what His Son did.
So, what is the practical application? It's looking every day for a way to encourage, a way to share hope. Sometimes it's smiling and encouraging, even when we don't feel like it.
Hope doesn't always come in a basket or a trinket. Sometimes we find it in a quiet voice saying it will be ok, take the next step. Other times we find it in the beauty of a single icicle or the intricacy of a single leaf on a tree. Sometimes we find it in the peace of the woods or the power of a mountain landscape or rushing river.
Sometimes hope is found in the eyes of those we love, and sometimes we are meant to share the hope we have inside us to make that person's eyes come to life again. We have a choice every day, to share hope or tear it down. I want to share the hope I have inside of me with you. I want to share with you the beauty of life, of creation of God's grace and strength in the midst of all of the bad stuff.
When the "real" world creeps in on Wall Street and banks and the fear of losing everything. When job losses abound and everything is so heavy we don't know what to do, where do we turn? When the lights go down, when health won't cooperate, who do we lean on?
Personally, I look for a reason to give. I look to God to hold me up when I'm not strong. I thank Him for His blessings.
I remember the words of Jesus in Matthew 11:29, 30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
I also remember His words in Luke 12:22-26 ..."Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?"
Sometimes we spend so much time worrying, we forget to share the hope that is in us. We forget to give that smile. That strong, encouraging word that they can make it! We may think it's sappy, but its not. In times of struggle, lets stand together and spread hope & smiles like the person next to us may not see another for a lifetime.
Lets not forget to share the beauty of this life God gave us and give people hope for a future of good in the midst of all their circumstances.
Be bold! Share hope & a smile today! :-)
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Grace is enough
What is control? Today started out as a good day. I was excited that it was my Sunday to take the kids to church. I only woke up a little sore. I went ahead and took my nerve blocker and then ate my oatmeal and took my Advil with it.
I was surprised when we got there to find out it was Baptism Sunday. Baptism Sunday is so cool. It's a strong reminder of God's grace & the salvation that we have from Him. Before each person is baptized they play a pre-recorded testimony of why they are making that commitment and statement of their faith through baptism.
As the service went on, I sent my wife Twitter's and text messages about the parts of it that kept touching my heart. (I really look forward to when we can stop doing Sundays in shifts & we can sit next to each other and nudge each other & comment on the cool parts again!)
All of this was going on, and the pain started building up. I really thought I had it under control. I shifted in my seat to ease the pressure off one side & let it move to the other. The service was simple, but riveting & I didn't want to get up and miss a moment of the passion for God, what was going on. The service ended with a call & prayer to salvation and prayer at the front for the newly baptized.
The service was over & Brad & I waited at the children's church door for Grace. I knew the nerve blockers were working, because instead of sharp shooting pain, I had this build-up of pressure pain. It was quivering my insides and my muscles felt like they were spasming, almost like I'd worked out too hard. Every breath was becoming deliberate as the pressure built up in my chest muscles. Feeling like I was losing my balance, I steadied myself on the post next to the door and waited for children's service to be over. I'm thanking God for His blessings and asking Him for strength.
I got to the car and waited for Grace while Brad talked to his friend Zak. The outside cold air had seemed to give me temporary relief, for maybe 10 steps from the door. I walked the rest of the way to the car, trying not to breathe too deeply, as each breath caused more pain.
Brad & Grace in the car, I put my focus on getting home. Shifting my position in the car seemed to do ok, stopping the car feels like it's jerking my body, putting a collapsing pressure on every bone and muscle from my sides-stomache region up front to back. When I turn a corner it feels like the same pressure from the side. All I can do while I'm driving is say Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord as I push through the pain to make sure I get home. My focus has to be on that end goal.
Getting home and pulling in the driveway and stepping out of the car, I want the pain to go away. It doesn't, it feels like it's crushing my lungs, I'm sweating and feel like all my muscles are spasming. Each breath is a deliberate push against the pain. Each step is a deliberate thought to get in the house, get my coat off, go to the bathroom. It's like I'm forcing my whole body to go through the motions. Every piece of me feels like bruised quivering painful meat. A few minutes to get to finally lie down on the couch feels like forever.
I lie down and close my eyes, forcing relaxation and breathing, the pressure is finally subsiding and I realize about half an hour has gone by. Heather is standing over me, wanting to take me to the emergency room. She's scared, but I tell her, no, it's mostly over, the worst part is done. Another half hour and I feel like a bruise. Most of the quivering is gone and I can breathe normally, mostly without pain.
My whole body feels like I just ran a marathon, or those times when I was a teenager and my muscles burned and I still would push myself to do 10 more pushups or run an extra quarter mile, even when my body screamed that it couldn't.
So, I think I'm in control. I sit till it hurts too much to sit, then I stand & walk around till it hurts too much to do that, then I lie down for a while, then I start over. When I feel myself going to far, I take breaks, thinking I'm in control. I take my medicine, I look in the mirror and feel normal. I just hurt. I want to will my body to cooperate, and it keeps not.
Trying to walk the pain off the other day, I paced into the kitchen and shut the microwave. As it was shutting I moved my hand, but it didn't go where it was supposed to, for a few seconds, it felt like a strange thing on the end of my arm and woosh a pitcher of koolaid went to the floor. I thank God for my 13 year old, Brad took control in that moment to clean up the mess I made.
I'm not sure what's happening, my doctor's not sure what's happening; But I thank God in every moment, for every moment. I thank Him for every day. I thank Him for my awesome children, family and wife.
I may not be able to control what is going on, but I know that God's strength & grace is all I need. I know that I can be a blessing and move forward, no matter how I "feel". 2 Corinthians 12:9 says "...he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."
Being a Christian isn't about everything being easy. It's not about not dealing with real life. Sometimes it's about being a weak bag of flesh, but knowing that God's grace and strength is enough to get you through! Isaiah 40:30-31 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
Whether things get tough or easy, we can't take the Word of God lightly. There is true power in it that is not diluted by circumstances, feelings or events. We can share that hope, that strength, that peace, even when we are tapped out, because the timelessness of God's grace and strength far surpasses ours.
I was surprised when we got there to find out it was Baptism Sunday. Baptism Sunday is so cool. It's a strong reminder of God's grace & the salvation that we have from Him. Before each person is baptized they play a pre-recorded testimony of why they are making that commitment and statement of their faith through baptism.
As the service went on, I sent my wife Twitter's and text messages about the parts of it that kept touching my heart. (I really look forward to when we can stop doing Sundays in shifts & we can sit next to each other and nudge each other & comment on the cool parts again!)
All of this was going on, and the pain started building up. I really thought I had it under control. I shifted in my seat to ease the pressure off one side & let it move to the other. The service was simple, but riveting & I didn't want to get up and miss a moment of the passion for God, what was going on. The service ended with a call & prayer to salvation and prayer at the front for the newly baptized.
The service was over & Brad & I waited at the children's church door for Grace. I knew the nerve blockers were working, because instead of sharp shooting pain, I had this build-up of pressure pain. It was quivering my insides and my muscles felt like they were spasming, almost like I'd worked out too hard. Every breath was becoming deliberate as the pressure built up in my chest muscles. Feeling like I was losing my balance, I steadied myself on the post next to the door and waited for children's service to be over. I'm thanking God for His blessings and asking Him for strength.
I got to the car and waited for Grace while Brad talked to his friend Zak. The outside cold air had seemed to give me temporary relief, for maybe 10 steps from the door. I walked the rest of the way to the car, trying not to breathe too deeply, as each breath caused more pain.
Brad & Grace in the car, I put my focus on getting home. Shifting my position in the car seemed to do ok, stopping the car feels like it's jerking my body, putting a collapsing pressure on every bone and muscle from my sides-stomache region up front to back. When I turn a corner it feels like the same pressure from the side. All I can do while I'm driving is say Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord as I push through the pain to make sure I get home. My focus has to be on that end goal.
Getting home and pulling in the driveway and stepping out of the car, I want the pain to go away. It doesn't, it feels like it's crushing my lungs, I'm sweating and feel like all my muscles are spasming. Each breath is a deliberate push against the pain. Each step is a deliberate thought to get in the house, get my coat off, go to the bathroom. It's like I'm forcing my whole body to go through the motions. Every piece of me feels like bruised quivering painful meat. A few minutes to get to finally lie down on the couch feels like forever.
I lie down and close my eyes, forcing relaxation and breathing, the pressure is finally subsiding and I realize about half an hour has gone by. Heather is standing over me, wanting to take me to the emergency room. She's scared, but I tell her, no, it's mostly over, the worst part is done. Another half hour and I feel like a bruise. Most of the quivering is gone and I can breathe normally, mostly without pain.
My whole body feels like I just ran a marathon, or those times when I was a teenager and my muscles burned and I still would push myself to do 10 more pushups or run an extra quarter mile, even when my body screamed that it couldn't.
So, I think I'm in control. I sit till it hurts too much to sit, then I stand & walk around till it hurts too much to do that, then I lie down for a while, then I start over. When I feel myself going to far, I take breaks, thinking I'm in control. I take my medicine, I look in the mirror and feel normal. I just hurt. I want to will my body to cooperate, and it keeps not.
Trying to walk the pain off the other day, I paced into the kitchen and shut the microwave. As it was shutting I moved my hand, but it didn't go where it was supposed to, for a few seconds, it felt like a strange thing on the end of my arm and woosh a pitcher of koolaid went to the floor. I thank God for my 13 year old, Brad took control in that moment to clean up the mess I made.
I'm not sure what's happening, my doctor's not sure what's happening; But I thank God in every moment, for every moment. I thank Him for every day. I thank Him for my awesome children, family and wife.
I may not be able to control what is going on, but I know that God's strength & grace is all I need. I know that I can be a blessing and move forward, no matter how I "feel". 2 Corinthians 12:9 says "...he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."
Being a Christian isn't about everything being easy. It's not about not dealing with real life. Sometimes it's about being a weak bag of flesh, but knowing that God's grace and strength is enough to get you through! Isaiah 40:30-31 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
Whether things get tough or easy, we can't take the Word of God lightly. There is true power in it that is not diluted by circumstances, feelings or events. We can share that hope, that strength, that peace, even when we are tapped out, because the timelessness of God's grace and strength far surpasses ours.
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