Thursday, November 06, 2008

Refuge in a time of trouble - God doesn't change

We are in a political climate where a lot of people are shocked and dismayed about the new President-elect. I have even written multiple times & in multiple places that I am disappointed. However, I'm not afraid or angry, because my hope doesn't come from who holds the office of president. I'm at peace about it.

Why? Don't you see the impending end of all things we hold dear with this man as president?

Come on people. He's only a man. God is still bigger. Maybe that sounds clichéd, but I can tell you that in my life and my family’s life, it's not clichéd. "But it has to be, you can't mean it", you say.

Yes, I mean it. God has been our Refuge, our whole Christian lives, our whole marriage. We have seen everything go, and we have been at the lowest point possible where we foolishly lost everything & He has promoted. He promoted us to the point where we were able to use finances to bless, over and over, many times. Even the home we are in, He not only provided and gave us peace about it, but we turned down looking at bigger homes, because we wanted to be wise & make sure our finances would be available for God’s use in times of need.


2nd Samuel 22:31 As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.


Over two years ago, things in our lives started getting tough. I had been a workaholic for a technology company, but yes, still a Christian and trying to make sure my life and my attitude were a testimony to those around me. (No, not perfect, just trying to live for Christ and others.)

Around Thanksgiving, we had pipes in the upstairs of our house freeze and burst, we had a hole in our ceiling for Christmas, New Years, Valentine’s Day, a really long time before everything got fixed. At first, I freaked out, but then, my family thought I was crazy, because I just kept telling them; we need to rejoice in all things, God never allows anything but He turns it for His good. Then, about a week and a half later, I fell, and severed a ligament in my ankle which lingered on for several months before being diagnosed and treated properly. After a lot of physical therapy, a surgery and then a lot more physical therapy, I was finally able to walk again. In the midst of all that, I had the blessing of losing a lot of weight. (Hint, pain is not advisable, but can be an excellent weight loss program). I dealt with many times of frustration, but I only wanted to keep face front, forgive, no blame, just keep thanking God and moving forward.

A few months after being blessed to be able to walk again, mostly without pain and done with physical therapy, February of 07, I believe, I started having severe pain attacks in my body. Going in to the ER, they thought I was an alcoholic because my liver enzymes were off the charts. Thing is, I didn't (and don't) drink. They couldn't find anything and the attacks and pain continued. About a week later (after blood tests every day/every other day) they discovered the problem was my gall bladder. Cool, we thought, a standard, easy surgery and everybody goes home happy.

Well, easy was true, but something went wrong. I wasn't supposed to continue in pain and it continued. After being released to go back to work, I found I was in intense pain just sitting at my desk. The doctor ran another week or two of tests, told me she couldn't find anything, and I went back to work again, still in lots of pain and taking a ton of Advil/Ibuprofen to combat it. She said, "Well, this will probably take a year to go away, it happens with some patients." Well, the all clear from the doctor was good enough for work and they laid me off the Monday after getting the note.

After the layoff, we did what anyone would do; we thanked God for His blessings and applied for unemployment. I think I was on unemployment for about two weeks, before we decided to start our own small computer services business. During this time was also when I did some heavy physical work to help out some friends and found out it was making me sick and tired in a weird way. (This continued with each camping trip However, I was determined to serve God, my family and others that I wanted to help grow their businesses, so we pressed forward.

I believe the best way for us to not get caught up in our own struggles and problems is to serve others. God then brought a couple of small family members into our lives that needed help. We jumped at the chance and delved into an adventure that fully tested us, to our limits. Throughout I continue to have to use ibuprofen, 3 to 4 pills, 3 times a day, to fight off the internal pain and to allow myself to work, sleep and drive as much as possible. God provided work for us and we kept pushing.

Well, I started having more problems with the pain and lack of sleep, which resulted in randomly dropping things or being in a lot of pain from doing too much, or pain when I go to pick up my little girl, even simple things like cutting the grass or weeding, leaving me in tons of pain the next day. The toll on my wife has been really tough too, as it has resulted in a change in focus of our business from onsite support services to remote support, simple web design services and things that can be sold through internet store fronts.

I’ve had days where, I’ve pushed too hard, and then been useless the next day, or left a client and got in my car to drive home and been in tears because my body was throbbing in so much pain. I pretty much have constant dark circles under my eyes, because I sleep between nerve blockers and ibuprofen wearing off. (Yes, I’ve been on a few different pain medicines and visits to the doctor, and thankful to a gracious family member and the doctor I’m now on nerve blockers too, which are at least having the effect of providing more sleep at night.)


So, where is the refuge, where is the joy in all of this? Funny, huh? But we are getting there. When driving hurts, you try to drive less. When sitting hurts, you find ways to sit that don’t. You also change your business and what you do, to something that you can do. You find out that the best laid plans and effort of a year’s work that is tied to something that will never happen, have to be restarted, rewritten. You also find that all the money and time you put into it, are gone, like vapor. You find that finances and money, become non-essentials. How is that possible, especially in this economy? Well, when the money is all gone and you let God take care of you, all things are possible.


It’s almost funny, because He is telling you to trust Him; He is going to take care of you. Keep doing what you know is right. People start to get mad at you. Even some Christians get upset with you. You can’t trust God for that stuff. You better do something. Heck, you better let the government take care of you. (For my opinion on that, go to http://www.phoenixfirst.org & click on the green "This Week's Service" button in the middle of the page, "The Future of America".)


Go, lie to people Tell them you’re body is ok, until you get medical insurance and last until they fire you; you can’t just trust God, that’s not enough. However, God has put a peace in us, that He’s in charge and He will provide all our needs according to His riches in glory. In Matthew 6:25 Jesus said “do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear”.


Then, your fridge is empty. You pray for Him to fill it. He does. We have seen, not just day after day, but month after month, God providing our needs. It has become commonplace, so much a miracle, where work will come in, or customers you never thought would pay, pay their bill. God keeps teaching you, sometimes through people you don’t even expect, that He will provide.


The thing is, people want to say, oh, you should have done this or that. I never would’ve done that! Why don’t you sue this person or that?


First of all, God is in charge. All of our steps are ordained by Him. He’s the one who took a former janitor and put him into high places. He’s the one that was there, when the body broke, the surgery went wrong and the layoff came. He was bigger than all of that. He has been there as the days have gone by and kept the fridge full and the mind and body full of supernatural peace.


He is that exciting of a Lord, that when people say “be practical”, He says to give. Look for ways to bless, look for ways to reach out, to encourage. He tells us to not focus on ourselves, focus on others and He will do the rest. It’s an amazing thing, when you find you don’t have any more in you and God steps in, picks you up and carries you. I want to shout it out, How great His love and provision are!


Second, God’s logic doesn’t match yours or mine. My logic says push yourself (and I’ve tried & I end up in a lot of pain and weak for days) go, do. See, Jesus says, Come unto me all you that are weary and heavy burdened and I will give you rest. Man’s logic says hold on to everything you have, God’s logic says give and it shall be given unto you.


Third, we have been trusting God, why would we stop now? Why would we let current events even effect our faith in God’s provision. Why am I not afraid? Because, the words of God are true, they are ALIVE, and they are relevant today. Heck, the Bible says God uses the foolish things of the world to confound the wise. Well, He definitely got that right with me and my family. We have done what we can, and serving where He tells us to and He keeps stepping in and doing the rest. God has been providing for us non-stop over the past year and a half, ways for us to be a tangible help and I expect no less for the next year and a half.


I wish I could shout this to you, shoot it straight through like a bolt of light into your heart and mind! God is our Refuge, our high-tower that provides joy and peace and strength in the midst of constant, ongoing pain and trouble. He Provides!


Some people have said they were afraid or worried for us! Thank you, but don’t worry, God is in charge, nobody is kicking Him off His throne! See, my Heavenly Father has more provision and more money than banks, mortgage companies, governments.


  • So, today, I’m not going to the Sheriffs’ sale for this home.
  • I'm not going to worry about those God has allowed in authority over our country, I'm going to pray for them.
  • I’m going to go do what work I can to promote and build a future for a lot of people.
  • I’m going to give and serve my family and others in joy and peace, not in fear and dismay.
  • I’m going to look for a way to encourage you, to tell you that God is so faithful, even when we are foolish!

I believe that where we have been and where we are going are not there to tear your heart out, but to lift you up in joy and peace, to give you hope and faith in God’s provision no matter what!







Philippians 4:4-7 says Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

2 comments:

niccole said...

I needed ths at this very moment.found it on the eb.GOD is awsome in all his ways.

Anonymous said...

i needed this right now found it on the web.GOD bless you.